Are you listening to me?

Are you listening to me?

There is a big difference between listening and hearing.  Listening is being ready to act on something that we have heard and hearing is having the ability to hear sounds.  I get so frustrated when I am speaking to someone,  and I can see they are desperately keen to get their response in before I have even finished what I am saying – what does that tell me?  That they can hear me, but they are not listening properly to what I am actually saying.  What bothers me about this is, not only am I not being listened to properly which is pretty disrespectful, but also that my words are likely to be misrepresented because they are not hearing me correctly.

If I speak with an intention, I am opening myself to incorrect interpretation by those hearing my words but not listening to what I am saying.  This is not good.  So I needed to write this blog to send out the message ‘I can tell when you are not listening to me properly!’

It is a source of irritation for many people, not just me, and it is far more dangerous, especially in relationships, than we might give credit to.

As always, the tarot can give us an indication that this is an issue, and the card that might prompt us is likely to be the Page of Swords.

The Page of Swords represents, on the one hand, speaking about matters without really understanding the subject at hand because we are new to it, and on the other, about misinterpreting conversations, spiteful gossip and perpetuating rumours.  The card’s overall meaning is about being careful as to what we say, and being just as careful about what we are hearing….in other words watch what you say: how you say it and what you hear: how you relay it.  How good are we at relaying the truth of what people tell us?  And if the story is second, or even third, hand can we honestly believe what we are being told?  Just think of all the missed words and nuances as well as the misinterpretations that may have been added and a bit of exaggeration to boot.  It is easy to see how things can get out of hand.

As I have grown older I have learnt about the importance of listening properly and, especially to not be a go-between – I always advise that it is best to hear it from the original source because so much more can be gleaned from someone first hand.  Making sure we are truly listening to what is being said is what will make a fundamental difference to any relationship, romantic or otherwise – (I was pretty sure a doctor I used to be registered with wasn’t listening very well to me, because he was distracted by keeping his computer records up to date! I made sure I registered with another one!) –  but more importantly, as we are now teaching our little ones to ‘use their listening ears’, maybe we should understand that focusing much more on truly listening to what people say, is going to make our lives a lot easier, and communication much more effective.

So, ‘listening ears’ on folks…….. try not to speak before hearing me out, and stop faffing with your phone because although you can hear me, I am absolutely sure that you aren’t listening ………….

Patricia x